Wednesday, June 20, 2001

What do u think of this essay?

I wrote an essay and i have no idea if it's good or not...
i've just turned 17, i live in italy...it's been 5 years since i have been in an english school, and wrote an english essay at this level. I did this essay just to see how i do.
Can u tell me what you think please.
It's probs **** though lol


What was the most difficult time in your life? How did you overcome these difficulties?

I’m a 17 year old girl, and already, I think that I have had many difficult periods of time throughout my adolescent years. Some in a very complex way, however, nothing that not one person in this world has been through or couldn’t understand. To begin with I think that any child who was put or who is the same position as I was during the divorce of my parents can be difficult on any child, which can really affect children’s personalities as they develop. However I conceder myself fortunate that this problem occurred at a very early part of my life, at the time I couldn’t understand the problems or consequences of this majeure alteration, however as a result I ascertained how this big change, was and in some ways still affecting me as I get closer and closer to becoming an adult. Therefore, I think that is the motive of my difficult time which occurred at the stage of my adolescent years, at around 13 years old.
As I have previously stated, my parents got divorced, which resulted to my mother getting married a 2nd time, to someone, in my eyes, very arrogant, and of course I always had those four words imprinted in my mind: “he’s not my dad”!
For this I didn’t have a very moral relationship with the people closest to me at home. So I turned to the only possibility I could find as a reason not to return home, for me my house was a like a hotel, I slept there, I showered there and ate there, I spent the rest of my time out on the streets with my friends, which made problems worse with not only my relationship with my mother and step father but also with society, because I think out of boredom, because there was nothing to do for the youth where I used to live, we used to get into a lot of trouble, but never meaning to hurt or distress someone, but for the buzz it gave us, it was like a drug, to do something wrong, and try to run away, always trying to avoid the consequences that came with our actions. A lot of that comes down to immaturity and in my opinion insurance. I think that parents should try to empathize, be patient and spend a little more time when a child acts in that way. Also to try to make the child understand that he won’t merit for the things that he’s doing, that his actions are unacceptable, that life is difficult and acting this way will never get you anywhere. Thus, I overcame my problems. My mother wedged this into my head, and to help me even more, she gave me an experience of a life time, to take me out of an environment that clearly wasn’t good for me and sent me to Italy a year earlier than I was suppose to go with my family.
Living in Italy was one of my most difficult experiences that I’ve had to face but it also helped me overcome problems that I had before. In conclusion, there I opened my eyes to the reality of life, to new experiences, a different culture and no one was there to hold me back, or tempt me to do something wrong. I was free to learn. In a way, I was sober, because I didn’t have that drug that would have brought me down a boulevard of darkness. Furthermore, as I got older my hormones changed and I was maturing, however If I had stayed in that environment at that time I don’t think I would be the individual I am today.

Answer on What do u think of this essay?

I think it is really well written and interesting. Keep up the good work.